Friday, 23 June 2017

The Taniwha

There were some people they look like they were looking for something to kill and cook it. There was some  long pointy grayish grass and some big huge mountain that can almost touch the sky. I can also see the Taniwhas big powerful tale wagging all around and hitting trees.

The big scary creature was hiding in the long grass. It's big long rough tail was so big it made the ground shake for a few seconds. The big scary beast  was a fierce creature it had spikes as sharp as a knife. The creature had sharp teeth like a shark that can bite you in half. The beast is might be hungry he might be looking for a snack.

I can feel the breeze blowing in my face. I can hear the Taniwha getting closer. I can smell his yuck smelly breath and his warm sticky breath on my neck. I can hear the big loud beast rrrrrrraaaawwww it was as loud as a lion and a alligator fighting.


  1. Hi Jane, this piece of writing gave me the goosebumps and I could almost feel the Taniwha that you wrote about breathing down my neck too. WOW this story really made me feel every word you wrote except the "smelly breath" part eeeewwwwwww. Keep up the good work Jane very proud of you.

  2. thank you so much but did it actually give you goosebumps